Are they rough, or smooth?
Whenever I ask this in public I get one of two responses. (Mrs. H-CC is both embarrassed and entertained when I do it. Actually, she probably feels that way most any time she is in public with me.)
Some people know exactly what I am talking about and immediately answer the question with confidence. I trust these people. We bond.
Others look at me with a confused, slightly annoyed expression.
That’s when I see an opportunity to educate.
Everything about an onion ring comes down to the characteristics of the batter. The majority of rings, at least that I’ve seen, have a smooth, greasy batter. They’re the kind you’d get at a state fair or something. The kind that come in a little red-and-white-checkered paper boat with wax paper in the bottom and hanging out on all sides. The kind that make you hear yourself getting fatter.
My kind of onion ring has a light, crunchy batter that looks basically dry to the eye, even if it leaves visible grease on your fingertips. Here is a good example. Note the color and roughness around the edges.
Next time you are considering onion rings as an appetizer or side, ask the server or the guy at the window, “Are they rough? Or are they smooth?” It’s the only thing you need to know.
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